Skip to main content
Subscribe to our Beano comic! Click Here
Beano Comic

60 Owl Jokes To Make You 'Owl' With Laughter!

These owl jokes are an absolute HOOT! Seriously, you'll be 'owling with laughter!

Owls are regarded as the wisest of all creatures, but that doesn't stop us telling some jokes about these winged nerds! 

And once you've laughed your socks off at these gags, why not check out these jokes about penguins and every topic you could possibly think of!

Why do boy owl babies take after their dad?

Like feather, like son!

What do you call an owl that changes things through magic?

An owl-chemist!

What do owls say when they're introduced?

Owl do you do?

What did the boxing owl do when they gave up?

They threw in the t-owl!

Why are these birds good listeners?

Because they're owl ears!

A butcher and an owl

Knock knock! Who's there? Barn owl. Barn owl who?

Correct!

What happens when you cross an owl with an oyster?

You get a pearl of wisdom!

A pearl with a New York background

What did mother owl say to their child?

You go and play, owl watch from here!

How does an owl travel long distances?

By owl-icopter!

Why do owls never celebrate a goal during a rainy game?

Because it’s too wet to whoo!

A goal hitting the back of the net

What bird do people use to dry their dishes?

A tea t-owl!

A man washing dishes

What do you get if you cross an owl with a skunk?

A bird that stinks, but doesn’t give a hoot!

Did you hear about the owl that turned 180?

They're not old, they just have a flexible neck!

What do you call a bird who's a scientific genius?

Owl-bert Einstein!

What is an owl's favourite Meghan Trainor song?

Owl About That Bass!

What is an owl's favourite telly show?

Doctor Hoo!

Doctor Who jokes
Doctor Who jokes

What do you call an owl who's bad at hide and seek?

A spotted owl!

What did the owl’s Valentine say?

You are hootiful!

What do you call a bird that does well in trivia quizzes?

A know-it-owl!

What does an owl call its beak?

Whoo nose!

What’s an owl's favourite book?

Horton Hears a Hoot!

A girls sits on a flying book with an eagle-human in the background

Why did the owl say 'moo'?

It was learning a second language!

What’s an owl’s favourite Beatles song?

Owl You Need is Love!

How do owls revise for exams?

They don't – they wing it!

What is an owl’s dream job?

A pilot!

An aeroplane flying over a city

What did the naughty owl say to the teacher?

I'm talon you, it wasn't me!

A teacher points at a student

Where do owls go for a meal?

Pizza Hoot!

What’s an owl’s favourite country to visit?

Owlgeria!

What’s an owl’s favourite dessert?

Mice cream!

Two owls are sitting on a perch and one says to the other...

"Can you smell fish?"

What did the owl say when they popped to the shop?

Owl be back soon!

What do you call an owl that takes from the rich and gives to the poor?

Robin Hoot!

What does an owl with attitude have?

A scowl!

What do you call an owl with a sore throat?

A bird that doesn’t give a hoot! 

What do confused owls say?

To-whit to-where?  

What is an owl’s favourite book genre?

A hoo-dunnit!

What’s an owl’s dream job?

Geowlogist!

Which football position do owls prefer to play?

On the wing!

A football in space

Which TV music judge is an owl's favourite?

Simon C-owl!

A woman enjoying some music

What do you call an owl who can wriggle out of any situation?

Hoo-dini!

An owl

What does a clever owl say?

Whom!

An owl flying

What’s the best date to tell an owl joke?

2-8-20

An owl against the Northern Lights

What did the cat wearing a bird disguise say?

Me-owl!

Cat in owl mask

Which prison was the naughty owl sent to?

Owl-catraz!

An owl in owl prison

What do you call an owl who works in a hospital?

Doctor Hoo!

An owl doctor, if there was such a thing

What does an owl use to dry themselves after a bath?

A t-owl!

An owl in a copper bath

What do you get if you cross an owl with a dog?

A growl!

An owl and a dog

How long does an owl live?

Six and a half books!

Hedwig and Harry Potter

Did you hear about the owl who had a sore throat?

They didn’t give a hoot!

An owl giving a silent hoot

What is an owl’s favourite part of autumn?

Owl-ween!

A brown owl wearing green sunglasses

Why did the owl watch the American football game?

They wanted to see the superb owl!

An owl in front of the USA flag

Why is always good to have an owl as a friend?

Because they’re a hoot!

An owl giving the thumbs up

What is an owl’s favourite board game?

Guess Hoooo!

An owl on a popular board game

What is an owl’s favourite subject?

Owl-gebra!

Algebra owl

What do you call an owl who’s good at quizzes?

A know it owl!

A clever owl

What do you call an owl wearing a suit of armour?

A knight owl!

An owl in a suit of armour

What's more awesome than a talking owl?

A spelling bee!

An owl wearing an eyepatch

Why did the owl throw a party?

They didn’t want to be owl by themselves!

An owl in a party hat

What is an owl’s favourite dessert?

Mice cream!

An owl with an ice cream cone

Why do owls never sing in the rain?

It’s too wet to woo!

An owl in the rain
Animal jokes
Vampire Chair

Trick or Treat?

Choose wisely...