Skip to main content
Subscribe to our Beano comic! Click Here
Beano Comic

46 Bird Jokes Which Might Ruffle Feathers!

Here's our collection of funny bird jokes and one-liners!

Fly to new comedy heights with bird jokes from Beano! We've got everything from duck jokes to chicken jokes.

And when you're ready to come back down to Earth, or even burrow under it, check out our funny insect jokes or animal jokes.

What side of a turkey has the most feathers?

The outside!

Turkeys on Christmas Island

What do you call a possessed bird?

A polter-goose!

A cat and a ghost

What's got a curly tail and flies?

A pig-eon!

What does a seagull drink out of?

A beaker!

What is the difference between a fly and a bird?

A bird can fly but a fly can’t bird!

Why did the chicken NOT cross the road?

Because it was a zebra crossing!

What is a seabird's favourite pop song from the 80s?

Gulls Just Wanna Have Fun!

What do you call a bird who stars in action movies?

Steven Seagull!

How many birds does it take to change a lightbulb?

Toucan do it!

Which bird always gets first place?

A peng-win!

What do you call a duck that works in a hospital?

A Health Quacktitioner!

Smiling red crested rooster and owl

How is a throwing a dictionary similar to birds flying south for winter?

They're both flying information!

winter jokes

Why do birds fly to warmer climates in the winter?

Because it's easier than walking!

winter jokes

How does a Penguin build a LEGO house?

Igloos it together!

What do you call a bird that's afraid to fly?

Chicken!

How does a chicken send mail to her friend?

In an Hen-velope!

What do chicken families do on sunny afternoons?

Have peck-nics!

What do chickens study at university?

Eggonomics!

Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in winter?

She was no spring chicken!

What did the duck say when he dropped the dishes?

I hope I didn't quack any!

What is a duck's favourite game?

Beak-a-boo!

Why did the duck cross the road?

Because there was a quack in the sidewalk!

Why did the duck join the baseball game?

To make a fowl shot!

Why do ducks fly South for the winter?

Because it's too far to waddle!

What is it called when it's raining ducks and geese?

Fowl weather!

What has webbed feet and fangs?

Count Duckula!

What kind of TV shows do ducks watch?

Duckumentaries!

Where do ducks go when they are sick?

To the duck-tor!

Which bird steals soap from your bath?

A robber duck!

Knock, knock! Who's there? Twit. Twit who?

Help, another owl!

knock knock jokes

Knock, knock! Who's there? Hoo. Hoo who?

Mum, there's an owl at the door!

knock knock jokes

They told me to stop doing flamingo impressions...

I had to put my foot down!

What did the snowman say to the robin?

I have snow idea!

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?

Cliff!

What do you get if you cross a centipede with a parrot?

A walkie-talkie!

What do you call a penguin in the desert?

Lost!

What do you get if you cross a canary with a lawnmower?

Shredded tweet!

Why do owls get invited to parties?

Because they're a hoot!

What did the duck say to the waiter?

Put it on my bill!

What do you call a duck who's always telling jokes?

A wisequacker!

What do you call two birds in love?

Tweethearts!

Why did the bird fly into the library?

Because he was looking for bookworms!

Why did the bird go to the hospital?

To get tweetment!

What bird is always out of breath?

A puffin!

What kind of bird sticks to clothes?

A vel-crow!

A raccoon playing a guitar - follow the link from our dog jokes to our animal jokes
Vampire Chair

Trick or Treat?

Choose wisely...