Skip to main content
Subscribe to our Beano comic! Click Here
Beano Comic

20 Best Zodiac Sign Jokes & Puns

These zodiac puns will leave you starry eyed! Check out these funny zodiac jokes and see which ones make you laugh the most!

All the signs point to these zodiac jokes being very funny! And if these made you giggle, check out more space jokes here! How about these hilarious astronomy jokes! Maybe you'll enjoy these marvellous moon landing jokes? We've even got planet puns! And as always, check out even more fun jokes here!

I really hope I win the zodiac competition...

Or at least get a constellation prize!

My friend stop talking to me because of all my zodiac puns

It Taurus apart!

What sort of twins sparkle?

Gemini!

I always knew I was destined to be a Libra...

It was written in the stars!

Why should you never hang out with Cancers?

They're always crabby!

I hate Capricorns...

They really get my goat!

I'm pretty sure my starsign is a fish...

I just need to put the Pisces together!

What do Leos eat?

Lion bars!

What kind of corn do goats eat?

Capricorn!

I don't like Pisces...

There's something fishy about them!

Which zodiac sign didn't make it off the Titanic?

Leo!

I don't like Scorpios...

They're always so nippy!

What do zodiac signs use to pay for things?

Starbucks!

Why should you always ask a Libra for their opinion?

To get a balanced view!

Which star sign is covered in scales?

Pisces? No, Libra!

I don't believe in zodiac signs...

But that's because I'm a Taurus

Did you hear about the shop full of Aries?

It was rammed!

Where do Sagittarius go when they're sick?

The horsepital!

What tells your future at Halloween?

A horrorscope!

What's got hooves and can tell your future?

A zodiyak!

Vampire Chair

Trick or Treat?

Choose wisely...