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26 Good Morning Jokes to Tell First Thing

Drag yourself out of bed and get your morning mirth on with these funny morning jokes!

These deliciously daft morning jokes are guaranteed to turn your yawns into yuks! So grab some cereal and settle in for some amazing A.M. comedy! (The A.M. stands for Absolute Mirth.)

If these jokes grab you by the guffaws, why not check out our tremendously tickling time jokes or some nutty New Year's jokes! For all you smarty-pants - or any other type of pants people - be sure to take a peek at our cracking clever jokes. Not to mention all the great jokes on the jokes page! Look, JOKES! we can NOT make it any clearer.

What do lobsters drink in the morning?

Claw-fee!

How does the ocean say good morning?

It waves!

Why did the alarm clock get cross?

He was all WOUND UP!

Why did the spider only put one leg out of her bed?

She wanted to start the day off on the right foot!

An open mouthed purple spider

Why wouldn’t the T-Rex get out of bed?

He was still dino-SNORING!

When do ducks usually wake up?

At the quack of dawn!

How do skeletons like their eggs?

TerriFRIED!

Grinning skeleton wearing green sunglasses doing the Dab Fortnite dance

I saw a squirrel this morning cycling through the park.

I didn't know they can ride bikes!

During the school year, what’s the number one thing kids wish for on Sunday night?

A foot of snow by morning!

Monday jokes

How do cheeses greet each other on Monday mornings?

Have a Gouda week!

monday jokes

What did the Cyclops say every Monday morning?

Eye don’t want to get up!

monday jokes

On Monday morning, rolling out of bed is easy.

Getting up off the floor is another story!

Monday jokes

How did Garfield stop the rooster from waking him on Monday morning?

He ate him on Sunday night!

Monday jokes

What do bus drivers put on their morning pancakes?

Traffic jam!

pancake

Why does batter run away when you're making pancakes?

Because the recipe says to crack to eggs and then beat it!

pancake

What do bus drivers put on their morning pancakes?

Traffic jam!

Pancake jokes

This morning I tried to flip my eggs like I do with my pancakes.

Yolks on me!

Pancake jokes

How does a panda make pancakes in the morning?

With a pan... duh!

How do zoo keepers wake the animals in the morning?

They set their allamas!

llama jokes

Why doesn't Santa use reindeer milk in his coffee?

He's on a deery-free diet!

reindeer jokes

Why are zombies always hired as make-up artists?

Because they have to put their face on every morning!

halloween jokes

How does Shrek like his eggs in the morning?

Ogre easy!

What's the first thing wizards do in the morning?

They wake up!

Doctor, doctor! I've swallowed my pocket money!

Take this and we'll see if there's any change in the morning.

What do cows read in the morning?

The moospaper!

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