83 of the Best What Do You Call...? Jokes for Kids
Funny 'what do you call...?' jokes are here! It's the best selection from Beano's genius joke-masters...
What do you call a joke without a punchline…
We guess we'll never know the answer to that one! But the best thing about this joke is that the possibilities for punchlines are infinite! You could literally use this kind of joke to talk about anything you like: vegetables, fruit, seagulls, sport, farts! See, anything you like. You could even combine them to make the world's biggest 'what do you call' joke. You could even stretch it out to an hour long story and become a comedian at one of those Scottish comedy festivals they have every summer.
Or you could keep them short and sweet, which is why we've collected 83 – the perfect number – of these kind of gags for you to use on your friends and family!
Once you're done with these classic What do you call...? jokes, we think you might also like our ace What did...? jokes. Not keen? We've also got Why did...? jokes and classic knock, knock jokes too.
What do you call an owl who can always escape?
Who-dini!
What do you call a heap of kittens?
A meow-tain!
What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?
An investi-gator!
What do you call a witch that lives at the beach?
A sand witch!
What do you call a bagel that can fly?
A plain bagel!
What do you call a bird who stars in action movies?
Steven Seagull!
What do you call a pineapple that plays the trumpet?
Tooty fruity!
What do you call an insect with a pack of cards?
Ant and Deck!
What do you call an annoyed lobster?
A frustacean!
What do you call a cow who plays guitar?
A moo-sician!
What do you call a woman with a frog on her head?
Lily!
What do you call someone who has seen an iPhone being stolen?
An iWitness!
What do you call a Ford Fiesta out of gas?
A Ford Siesta!
What do you call a Spanish man who has lost his car?
Carlos!
What do you call a fight between celebrity actors?
Star Wars!
What do you call an angry pig?
Disgruntled!
What do you call a man with five pieces of wood on his head?
I don't know, but Edward Woodwould would!
What do you call a man with two pieces of wood on his head?
Edward Woodwood!
What do you call a man with a piece of wood on his head?
Edward!
What do you call a magic Labrador?
A Labracadabdoor!
What do you call a pig that knows karate?
Pork chop!
What do you call two people who rob clothes shops?
A pair of knickers!
What do you call a sheep with no head or legs?
A cloud!
What do you call Santa’s little helpers?
Subordinate Clauses!
What do you call a comedian who can’t sit down?
A stand up comedian!
What do you call the best maze ever?
A-maze-ing!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A miaowntain!
What do you call a very excited pillow?
A whoopee cushion!
What do you call a snowman’s dog?
A slush puppy!
What do you call cheese that doesn’t belong to you?
Nacho cheese!
What do you call a ghost comedian?
Dead funny!
What do you call a bear without any teeth?
A gummy bear!
What do you call the person who pulls the best prank on April Fools' Day?
April cool!
What do you call a hammer bought on April 1st?
An April tool!
What do you call a dog falling from a great height?
A chihuahu–aaaargh!
What do you call a pig who steals stuff?
A hamburglar!
What do you call a smelly fairy?
Stinkerbell!
What do you call a cat who likes to eat beans?
Puss 'n' Toots!
What do you call a dinosaur fart?
A blast from the past!
What do you call broccoli when it becomes a ghost?
Cauliflower!
What do you call a small Valentine's Day card?
A Valen-tiny!
What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious!
What do you call Santa when he's on a tea break?
Santa Pause!
What do you call a belt with a watch on it?
A waist of time!
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Cliff!
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
Philippe-Philoppe!
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
What do you call dogs who did up ancient artefacts?
Barkaeologists!
What do you call a tiger at the North Pole?
Lost!
What do you call a musical insect?
A humbug!
What do you call a spaceship that drips water?
A crying saucer!
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk!
What do you call an elephant in a phone box?
Stuck!
What do you call fish with no eyes?
A fsh!
What do you call a dinosaur as tall as a house, with long sharp teeth, and 12 claws on each foot?
Sir!
What do you call a donkey with three legs?
A wonkey!
What do you call a dinosaur who wears glasses?
A Doyouthinkysaraus!
What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?
Try-try-try-ceratops!
What do you call it when one cow spies on another?
A steak-out!
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No-eye deer!
What do you call alien eggs?
Eggstra-terrestrials!
What do you call a man with a car on his head?
Jack!
What do you call a man with gravy and potatoes on his head?
Stew!
What do you call a cow you can’t see?
Camooflaged!
What do you call a Tyrannosaurus rex when it wears a cowboy hat and boots ?
Tyrannosaurus Tex!
What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you?
Nacho cheese!
What do you call a Triceratops with carrots in its ears?
Anything you like, it can't hear you!
What do you call an adventurous egg?
An eggs-plorer!
What do you call an alien with three eyes?
An aliiien!
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
What do you call a pig who can't mind its own business?
A nosey porker!
What do you call a fast fungus?
A mush-vroom!
What do you call a mischievous egg?
A practical yolker!
What do you call a boy with a spade on his head?
Doug!
What do you call a duck who's always telling jokes?
A wisequacker!
What do you call a pistachio on a spaceship?
An astro-nut!
What do you call a really good plumber?
A drain surgeon!
What do you call a sleeping T-rex?
A dino-snore!
What do you call two spiders who just got married?
Newly-webs!
What do you call a pig with a black belt in karate?
A pork chop!
What do you call a fake lasagne?
An impasta!
What do you call a shark with a tie?
So-fish-ticated!
